| There and Back Again... |
[Jul. 8th, 2008|09:38 pm] |
Hmmm...
So I figured out one good thing about writing in this damn LJ. It helps me remember dates and things I've done. I can sit back and go, well - damn....so it was 3 years ago and in May that I left the last job at the law firm and decided to publish a local real estate trade magazine.
And I can never sit down and type out the minutia but when I am embarking on my next adventure, it seems easy enough. Also, I am extraordinarily rambly right now. So, after a couple years writing, selling ads, designing ads and schmoozing so much I began to loathe humanity, this is what I learned.
1) I hate sales.
2) A quasi biography can be written about a Realtor and be made to sound...eh...heartfelt and exciting.
3) 9-5 is not acceptable to me.
4) This is not what I want to do for the rest of my life.
So, I finally decided to go back to school, finish my BA in Psychology and go to law school. Yeah. It sounds like a decent plan, really. I will be dirt poor for a few years attending college as a full time student but I figured out I only need about $700 to survive per month comfortably. So here's to the Pell Grant and any other government aid I can get in addition to loans, etc.
As usual - everyone wants to give me advice. My answer: thanks, but unless you are actually paying for my education, that's all it is. Advice.
It's good to be free of the yoke of a job you are weary of. Once you leave a job for the first time and live through the initial fear of the free fall as you jump off that jagged cliff - it gets easier.
Working for the magazine did provide me with an awesome resume addition, though. How many people can say they ran a magazine? I am a published writer now, in two editions of a national publication. That's pretty fucking awesome. I have worked with top notch photographers, attended networking functions, covered grand openings of real estate offices, mortgage companies, title companies and housing developments as well as met some pretty interesting people. I have been able to polish the professional images of several people in the industry and change opinions simply by writing about them. I have seen companies rise and fall...I have seen individuals rise and fall. I have had those I wrote about smile, laugh and cry when they read their stories for the first time - all very favorable reactions.
When a grown man cries after reading about his own life, his own struggles for success - it's a good day. I was able to move someone...
Once I had a woman approach me regarding a cover story I wrote while I was at the magazine booth at a trade expo. She said, "you know - I know this guy...and I hated him when I first met him. I read the story you wrote about him. I had no idea that was what he was really like. Maybe, I will give him another chance." It's the moments like that that I live for.
So, in the grand scheme of things, even if this was like a lead ball and chain - the magazine did allow me to experience things. And really - I am all about experience these days. There are so many things I still want to do...
God - so help me, I still want to change the world. |
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| Helllllooooooo out there... |
[Jul. 7th, 2008|10:40 am] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | The 9th Circle | ] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  creative | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Tori Amos - Tear in Your Hand | ] |
HAHA! Anyway - so here I am after some centuries of not updating this thing. I really have nothing to say today...just wanted to put a new date on my latest entry. I think I have far too many thoughts to make a coherent entry.
So here is one of my recent drawings...
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| Hmmm - stolen from yummydementia |
[Jul. 16th, 2006|11:15 am] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  gloomy | ] |
 | You scored as Fallen Angel. You are a Fallen Angel empath. You have not found your place in this world yet and wander as a lost soul. Your wings have been clipped but you know deep inside they will grow back. You need to fly free and proud. Fallen Angels are spiritual beings who were trapped by flesh, and are now seeking to spread their wings again. (from the Book of Storms by Jad Alexander)
Fallen Angel | | 85% | Artist | | 80% | Traveler | | 80% | Judge | | 55% | Precog | | 55% | Universal | | 50% | Healer | | 35% | Shaman | | 15% | </td>
What Kind of Empath Are You?
created with QuizFarm.com |
This is kind of depressing LOL |
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| >.> |
[Feb. 22nd, 2006|01:33 pm] |
Okay - here's a meme, I was tagged by ![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif) daisy1313...
Name 5 of life's simple pleasures that you like the most. Try to be creative and original and not to use things that someone else has already used. Tag 5 people on your list.
I won't be tagging >.> but I will answer...
1) 'Mental health' days.
2) Being all icky and sweaty after Taekwondo or Kumdo.
3) Speeding down the road, music blaring, wind in my hair.
4) UKE!!!! <3 <3 <3
5) Meat...>.> REALLY. |
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| O_O |
[Jan. 1st, 2006|08:41 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  chipper | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Some depressing alternative jive... | ] |
Yo everyone...O_O Yeah - have been absent for a while...I have new online addictions...but I felt like adding a piccy here:
( Badly Colored Sketchie ) |
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| It lives!!!!! |
[Jul. 22nd, 2005|08:03 am] |
Yes, well - I've been absent from LJ for a while. Don't know why, just have. I've found a new addiction: y!-hosting.
http://yaoi.y-gallery.net/user/wastedmisery/
YOU HAVE TO BE 18 TO HAVE AN ACCOUNT - For uhm...obvious reasons...however, it is the best art site ever if you are into shonen-ai/yaoi and general manxman stuff. The artists on there range from well...stick figure stuff to out of this world SICK talent. Plus everyone is generally nice. A plus for me. Deviant Art just sucks since everyone and their mom has an account. The lack of kiddies is particularly a blessing since well...my patience grows thinner as I get older. And nope, not gettng any younger.
*waves* Hi Adrien!!! |
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| The Green Mile... |
[May. 3rd, 2005|09:00 am] |
Well, here I am - three days away from emncipation from the job I've had for 5 years. That's a long time for me. I'm to the point where I just can't wait to go. Although, I must admit...I'm a little wary. You never know if the brand new company you work for will go under. I keep telling myself that it won't because I won't let it.
I'm going to work off of Park Ave. in Winter Park which is one of the hot spots for all the Orlando snobs. Ah, I'm sort of a quasi snob anyway. There's also a Chamberlain's Natural Foods in the plaza next door, along with a movie theater, Border's and several over priced eateries.
I'm also 5 minutes away from my favorite hole in the wall anime store. Hmmm...bad. All I need now is the house I've been eye-balling for months now. I've seen the inside so I'm screwed. I want it. Bad.
I get business cards. I'm Office Manager. Hmmm...Michelle Y. Llamas, Office Manager. Let me get you some pencils from Office Depot or do your payroll for you. Makes me snicker.
Nam Myoho Renge Kyo, life is wonderful right now. I feel like I'm stuck in Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. Michi, save some for later... |
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| Poofy |
[Apr. 7th, 2005|09:45 am] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  annoyed | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | silence - tapping of the keys... | ] |
ARG! I curse my overly allergic skin. Kino put some eyeshadow on me the a couple days ago, only the second time I used it. It actually looked nice. Now - my eyelids are swollen and friggin' poofy...ACK! I took a Claritin...never taken one before, I hope to god I'm not allergic to that too.
Nothing is happening. I'm still poofy. I guess I just have to wait for the crap to get out of my skin...where my water? Must drink more water. Blarg!!!! |
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| Doo bee Doo bee Doo... |
[Apr. 5th, 2005|09:41 am] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | gloomy | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Smooth Jazz dribble | ] |
Watched some quirky film with Camui Gackt (formerly of Malice Mizer) and HYDE (L'arc) last night...O.O
The movie was called Moon Child...HYDE was a vampire and Gackt was his human buddy, they were gangsters ala Gungrave. What I liked most about it was listening to Cantonese, Japanese and English all in the same movie. It was interesting to say the least - all the little Asian boy eye candy was nice. We stumbled upon it quite by accident...stalking the halls of ye olde Blockbuster. I would have missed it entirely if it was not for Kino picking it up. She has an eye for interesting Asian films. Although - we did have a major miss the other night when we rented some bizarre Korean movie called...uh...shoot...I don't even remember what it was called. It was so awful we couldn't get through the first 10 minutes. We just returned the blasted thing.
The whole J-Rock/Pop thing is quite interesting. I have a couple of anime soundtracks but nothing to really qualify me as part of the fandom. I do love HYDE's voice, though. I also love the singer from Buck Tick's voice. I forgot his name...See - not really part of the fandom.
At work - back to the salt mines...
Oh...P.S. Johnny Depp is God. (Well, at least the God of the week for me...I rotate my deities) |
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| woohoo |
[Mar. 29th, 2005|08:45 am] |
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finally figured out that raft game...now I don't remember how it was done...-_- |
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| waaahhhh!!!! >. |
[Mar. 28th, 2005|03:39 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  contemplative | ] |
I'm working on this mind game...my brain is not analytical enough...or I'm just retarded. Anyone that solves it...lemme know. I only tried a couple of times so far...
( Weird Japanese IQ game ) |
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| Organic |
[Mar. 24th, 2005|08:56 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  and meaty | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | La Ley - Paraiso | ] |
Organic
Now, he understood. He let a knowing smile cross his pursed lips. All those years spent wondering. While sitting at breakfast, reading the papers or drinking a ginger ale while watching the news. He never understood the anger, the pure carnal violence. How awful, he used to think. How barbaric. How inhumane. That was until today.
Now, he watched the man across the street with his greasy belly hanging out of those pants that were several sizes too small. The fat digits on each hand fumbling with the wrapper of a half eaten moon pie were covered in dirt. Hair that was stringy with sweat and grime hung over a small face that seemed squeezed onto the bulging sun burnt neck.
His own slender, pale fingers with clear well-manicured nails gripped the steering wheel of the luxury sedan. The knuckles of each finger burned a tight white. He could feel his hands carving out a hollow in that massive girth, cutting off the gluttonous exposed flesh. He could feel his fingers sticking together, the tips rubbing against each other with sanguineous friction. What would it taste like, all that salt and grease? Meat that was fed on ill preserved corn syrup and malt?
Moby turned away, ashamed of himself. He was a vegan after all. |
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| Tired |
[Mar. 24th, 2005|05:19 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | Kill all the fuckheads!!! | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Sisters of Mercy | ] |
Okay - so one fuck signed our guestbook today. What a friggin' waste do time that thing is. I want to to ditch it since all that ever gets posted is fucking porn which we have to delete all the time and 13 year olds talking about themselves and writing stupid shit.
I'm pissed. I said I wouldn't get angry. But I'm fucking angry. I can't wait until Kino deletes the THREE entries this loser left.
I'm staying at work late and now I'm pissy. |
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| Present For Adrien |
[Mar. 18th, 2005|02:59 pm] |
|
 
I just made is worse, right? Okay...just kill me now...I meant well. |
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| (no subject) |
[Mar. 17th, 2005|09:27 pm] |
I beat you Adi - heheheheh, I'm more insane than you are :p
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| Waiting for a dream... |
[Mar. 15th, 2005|10:39 am] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  discontent | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Rufus Wainwright - Gay Messiah | ] |
I have been tempted on several occasions to read a Christopher Rice book. Went to the library last night because Kino wanted some quantum physics books. As usual, I wander aimlessly because I am simply not interested in anything there. I mean...nothing. I have developed a very peculiar taste when it comes to the written word. I figure, if I am going to read...it better be damn near orgasmic.
I think my ADD has just gotten worse with my age. I thought it was supposed to get better. I really do have to break out of this self induced apathy. Nothing seems interesting. Well, maybe it is a good thing. If I had some interests I would want to spend my money. Money I am supposed to save in the event I get a house. That plan seems to be sloshing around the drain right now. I am just stomping on the drain plug to keep it from completely swirling into the oblivion of wasted dreams. Damn it! I will get this house!!! Grrr...
As usual, I ramble - the whole point was to say that the library didn't have the Christopher Rice book. I have tried so hard to read it that now, it is practically an obsession. It is out in paperback and I can spend $5 to satiate my obsession. I think I get off pretty cheap. So, I just visited the A Density of Souls website and found out Christopher Rice is MY age with a best selling novel. Since I have always been a frustrated novelist, this really sucks. I hate hate hate comparing myself to other people. It always leads to self loathing. I want to be a novelist GODDAMN IT! I want to be so many things...Sadly, the is no "A for effort" sulking around somewhere. I need to write again...but I need to draw too...how do I do both?
WANT WANT WANT...I am frustrated. |
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| I've stopped taking medication...try some camomille tea. |
[Mar. 11th, 2005|06:09 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  predatory | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Cheesy Commercials on Radio - kill me now | ] |
You know Adi...you sound like the rest of us disillusioned 20-somethings. We are all just like...WHAT THE FUCK? Can I get an Amen!!! No...seriously...you've said it all, there is nothing for me to say in response to that...sapped of...energy...*dies* You got 5 good years left sonny...*croak* One and a half feet in the grave, as they say...heheheh. Then some fuck tosses a bannana peel in your path and you just slide in. *flicks off the highr power, gets struck by lightning*
I wasn't making fun of you...Kino and I feel you, brother.
I'm gonna drown my sorrows in sushi. Love ya. |
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| I've got a lovely bunch of coconuts |
[Mar. 9th, 2005|10:36 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  lethargic | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Creep - Radiohead | ] |
Big ones, Small ones, some as big as your HEAD...
Tired sleepy wanna go to bed. -_-zzzzz *drool* Oogle my new icon. He loves you. Good night. |
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| Anti-Americanism |
[Mar. 3rd, 2005|04:18 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | annoyed | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | More smooth jazz on the work radio | ] |
As I mentioned before, I have a DeviantArt account. One of today's deviations was in the political art section and featured President Bush in a most unflatering light. The title of the piece was American History Part 2. All right, I can appreciate political art, no big deal. I am also not a big Bush supporter.
However,the artist, who is from Europe, then begins to completely berate Americans. ALL Americans. He mentions that we are all ignorant and uneducated. He also blames us for the violence between the Israelis and the Palestinians. Right...I am so sure the U.S. incited that centuries old war. I respect everyone's opinion. I let him know that but I also let him HE was being incredibly ignorant for assuming ALL Americans were ignorant backwoods fuckwads. I really do lament the fact that a few ignorant rednecks do give the county a bad name. He continued to give US a history lesson re: the Cold War and the injustice done by our forefathers to the original inhabitants of this land. Oh and of course, our history books are all wrong. I had to let him know that YES we know the Cold War happened and YES we know that Native Americans were robbed of their land by the colonists and FUCK YES we know the Iraqis are pissed off at us.
I didn't even bother to mention that Europe was the FIRST continent to colonize. There is no such thing as compassionate colonization. The friggin' Spaniards killed off all the Incas and Mayans when they brought smallpox over to Mexico. Not to mention the Dutch, English and Portuguese. They enslaved and pillaged every people that they came across. Oh and the founders of this country ran out of Europe because they were being persecuted. They wanted religious freedom.
I should have gone into a tirade about religion and how it has driven the greatest disasters in human history: The Crusades, the Inquisition and now this Jihad bullshit. THAT'S WHY THE FRIGGIN' PALESTINIANS AND ISRAELIS DON'T GET ALONG. They hate each other. Granted Israel is our ally - but other countries have allies too. It's politics. it's dirty that we arm the Israelis to blow up Palestinians but if we don't arm them, it's not like the Palestinians will leave the Israelis alone. Sure, the Palestinians only want peace. What bullshit. I feel for individual citizens in countries who are cannon fodder (physically and mentally) for the wars of their leaders. This includes us.
I mean, this guy really had me steamed. Then again, I hate it when anyone lumps ALL groups together as if there weren't exceptions. There are always exceptions. I know that we are all guilty of generalization but come on...there are millions of people in this country. That's just as petty as calling french fries (which are not EVEN french) freedom fries because France disagreed with Bush.
ACK - I guess I was madder than I thought. Usually I had bullshit happy entries in here. (On a light hearted aside, Adi, I am taking after you now...>.< hehehehe) |
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